Motherhood Musings

 

Motherhood is hard.  It’s about choosing your hard though.  No one warns you that you’re going to lose yourself when you become a mother, whether it’s the first time, the second time or whatever number you might be up to.  Every time you see those two lines on a pregnancy stick, you immediately have new hopes and dreams.  Just they’re not for you, they’re for someone else; someone completely new who exists only in you.

 

Motherhood is hard.  The new version of yourself has plenty to learn each day; balls to juggle and sometimes drop.  Routines to instill and so many skills to teach – life skills, sports skills, learning skills, creative skills, money skills, negotiation skills, time management skills.

 

Motherhood is hard.  Managing friends – yours and theirs.  Managing time, prioritizing good food and good sleep.  Managing emotions – yours and theirs, especially when we may be learning to manage this for ourselves at the same time.  Managing schedules – yours and theirs; managing to keep one eye on the future and one firmly in the present, being present.

 

Motherhood is hard.  Being the default parent is hard.  The weight of the mental load is heavy, unseen and often born by the default parent.  The unrelenting, exhausting nature of being the default parent, being ‘on-call’ at all hours; paying the price, penalties and taxes.

 

Motherhood is hard but somethings that are worth doing are always going to be hard.  The hard is balanced by the sweet cuddles; the cozy bed time reading snuggles, their unbridled excitement to see you again after a day at school or daycare, or just any time apart from you.  We, their beloved mama’s (and dada’s) are the center of their universes and sometimes amongst the chaos and unending hardness of it all, we forget that simple truth.